Are we really Pro-life?

I know I haven't posted in a while, but that is due to a fantastic thing happening to me.......no longer addicted to the Internet, yay! No but seriously, my drive for Internet has decreased so dramatically in the past month that really all I want to do is hop on and check my email, and then hop right off again. It's been great, and my kids are really appreciating the all the fantastic cooking that has come from less time on the computer :) Since the first few weeks of our move transition were so stressful, I am taking time to do more things that bring me joy, i.e., taking my kids to the park, doing a bible study (Kay Arthur: Lord I Want to Know You has been great so far. It's right where I am at in my walk), cooking good healthy meals, and reading lots and lots of great Christian fiction :)

Sooooo, now that you know why I have been blogging ridiculously little lately, let's dive straight in to a controversial subject.

On to the topic at hand.

Are we pro-life? In asking that question I am going to present to you a scenario.

Imagine an Abortion clinic. It has a 6ft chain link fence around it, so that Christian protesters have to stand far enough away from the clients coming in to get their abortion.

A young woman pulls up in a beat up old car that spits and sputters and squeals until it comes it a jerky stop at the clinic. She slowly, sadly, but determinedly gets out, and begins to walk to the door when she hears a woman yell from the fence,
Protester: "Don't kill your baby! Please, God loves children, and He will provide for you, just trust Him!"

Young unwed teen: "Are you a Christian, lady?"

Protester:"Yes ma'am I am. Please choose life, God will work out all the details. He loves children and He loves you"

Young unwed teen: "Do you have a husband? A house? A car that works? Does your husband have a job?"

Protester: "Yes I do, actually."

Young unwed teen: "How many children do you have?"

Protester: "One boy and one girl......why do you ask?"

Young unwed mother: "Is that all you plan to have"

Protester: " OH yes, we decided our family was complete and my husband got a vasectomy 4 years ago. Again, why do you ask??"

Young unwed teen: "So your telling ME, a non believer, with no husband, no money, and no house, I should trust in "God" to provide for me when it comes to children, and to welcome that unwanted child into my life with open arms because God loves children. And YOU a Christian who trusts in the God I do not know, who has a husband, and money and a home, and a car that works, wont even DARE let the chance of conception happen because your so scared of having more."

Protester: "............choose life.............please....."

Young unwed teen: (as she turns to walk back to the abortion clinic she says over her shoulder) "yeah right......Hypocrite. IF you can't even trust him to take care of you and more children, why should I?"


She rings the bell and an Abortion nurse opens it for her. As the nurse is letting her in, she gets a glimpse of a different young lady among the protesters, and mumbles to herself "didn't I see that young woman in here a few weeks ago to pick up her birth control pills?"




So I ask you again, are you REALLY pro-life?

Let's be clear and make no confusion about my heart on this. I am not saying at all that if you use birth control of any kind, you are pro-abortion. I know many different families with many different views on children, and I know how much each one of them loves the Lord. I try and support all my friends in their personal decision that are between them, their husbands, and God.

But I cannot get away from the hypocrisy of it all when it comes to the pro-life movement in general.

Some of the women I knew, who I KNOW are pro-life, were so horrified when they found out my husband and I were getting a reversal and decided to let God bless us with more children. As many as He wanted actually. They were absolutely disgusted. How can I translate that with their STAUNCH pro-life stance? I just can't.

I volunteered as a counselor/client advocate at a crisis pregnancy resource center and all the while, my hope was that I could encourage, love on, and bring hope in the name of Christ to some of these hurting women. Not all women who came in wanted abortions, some just wanted a free pregnancy test. But some, whom I will never forget, where hurting, and scared, and desperately wanted to keep the baby, but didn't know how to make it work. They reminded me so much of myself at nineteen, pregnant, unmarried and scared to death , when I too had to walk in to a crisis pregnancy center because I couldn't even afford the ten dollar test. I remember the feelings of fear, hurt, and joy that you experience all at the same time when you find out your are expecting a VERY unplanned ill-timed pregnancy.

So I would comfort these women, and tell them about resources in the area who can help them with food, housing, and medical care. Then I would take them to the back room and give them maternity clothes so they could finally get out of their size 5 jeans that are being held together by a rubber band. I wanted so badly for them to know the love and peace of God. The peace that I had found. That is, in every area BUT children. My husband had a vasectomy when our second was only 2 weeks old. We loved the freedom that came with unprotected sex with no complications of having to deal with another pregnancy.

As I look back now I am filled with shame over my hypocrisy. Had any one of those women looked at me and asked "Do you trust God to take care of you if you get pregnant?". I would not have been able to answer.

Thank God that he has shown me the folly of my thinking in that area.

Some people reading this may think my judgments are harsh upon women unwilling to bear any more children for God. But the opposite is true. I RELATE! I remember the decision to get that vasectomy. I remember being sick my whole pregnancy, I remember my husband and I fighting so much, we walked the edge of divorce on more occasions than I could count. I remember feeling like, "I cannot do this again!"

But it was earthly, temporary and drenched in fear, not faith. It would not stay that way for long. Soon God would grow me and teach me to trust in Him. Soon my barren womb would cry out for life, only to be told every month, NO. My husband would also come under the same conviction and reverse what we had done.
I sit here now, 2 years after that reversal with no child to hold, no baby for my womb to nourish and grow, as it begs me each month to do. I grieve as all the women before me have grieved over infertility. Only mine was self inflicted. Fertility was a gift that I took for granted. Something I once had, but we broke.

BUT AT LEAST now I can say honestly to any woman who asks, I am pro-life. I will welcome any child God chooses to give me. And if you choose not to raise your child, I will gladly welcome that child into my home also.


In closing I say with love, don't just be pro-life in your politics.....be pro-life in your homes.

Kids Room.

OK, so a while back (about a year and a half ago) I typed out a post about how great it was for kids to share a room. I still think its great, and I think it teaches a lot about life when they do. However, a few months after that post was written we moved into a MUCH larger house that had 4 bedrooms (and only four people in our family). So we decided this would be a good time to let the kids have their own bedrooms. They did, they enjoyed it.......it didn't last long. Before we knew it (9 months later) we were moving again and this time from a 2000 square foot house with a garage, to a 1000 square foot apartment with two bedrooms. Needless to say the transition from sharing to not sharing, is way easier then not sharing to sharing. Did that make any sense what so ever? Probably not. What I am saying is that "stuff" accumulates when you have a whole room to fill. But when you try and take two filled rooms and attempt to condense that into one small room, things have to go. We were able to get rid of a lot of stuff and in the end the kids room ended up looking halfway decent instead of cluttered with things exploding out of every crevice. Although I do have to say the room does hold a remarkable amount of "stuff".
So how do you do it? Very carefully :)





And since the two who are sharing are opposites in gender, one got to put flowers on the wall.......



And the other got to put dinosaur stickers on the door. See, Mom's can solve all the worlds big problems.

I'm Back! on the Blog that is

OK OK OK it's been a ridiculous amount of time away from Blogging, I know. Really though this move has kicked my tushie (is that a word?). You would think that after the 12 moves in the (not quite) 9 years I have been married, I would have this thing down pat. Funny thing is, moves are kind of like babies, each one is different. Sometimes, I jump right in, meet new people, unpack and decorate all in the first two weeks. Other times, like now, I seem to live out of boxes for weeks on end, and not make one new friend for months. This seems to be one of those moves. Well, we have been in our new place for several weeks now, and its going slowly, but I am becoming adjusted to it more and more everyday. I really need to plug into a homeschool group soon though because I could use some friends out here for sure. However, what I need more than anything is Fellowship with other believers. We have yet to find a church that we truly want to stay in and connect with. We have visited two and are fairly certain, we will not return to either one. We really do not like "church shopping" and I do not consider that what we are doing, but you have to be careful to attend a church that will lift you up, and challenge you to stand firm in Christ, not water him down to nothing more than a few feel good sayings.
ohhhh I am sorry, that was a soap box moment wasn't it?

Anywhosy, here are some pictures of this kids (because what blogging mom doesn't love to fill in lost time with pictures of the kids:P). We went with my brother, his wife, and their adorable twin baby boys to a pumpkin patch. And while it was beautiful, I could have done without all the grotesque Halloween decorations. All in all though it was an excellent day, which we all needed very badly.

ENJOY! and have a beautiful night!


Here is my trusty duo behind those nifty wooden prop cut-outs


And here they are again behind yet another wooden prop cut-out (oh wait..there's more)
*insert evil laugh here*


Here is my handsome boy next to a very exciting tractor. We take very dramatic pictures, can't you tell?


Here is my adorable brother walking hand in hand with my girl. One of the few boys she will let come within ten feet of her :)


Oh here we are, just one more wooden prop cut-out picture because we love you all so much. (that and we sincerely lack creativity)


Lastly, here is my hubby holding my precious nephew Brighton.

Welcome to the Hotel California.

Hahahaha I laugh just looking at that title. Well we are officially in California now. We are staying at my mom's while we wait on our stuff to get here. We saw our condo today for the first time, and while it is half the size of our previous place, I feel so very blessed to have it. I have already formed an attachment to the little place, and I can't wait to move my stuff in.
About the title....I was on my way to California and was blessed to be able to stop and stay the night with Celee (who write the blog Miscellaneous Musings of a 5xmom) and her family. It was a great stay and we had a great time staying up late and talking it up. One thing we were talking about was how Jake and I NEVER thought we would return to California. When we left 5 and a half years ago we assumed we would plant roots somewhere and not leave. Things turned out a little differently and now we find ourselves back. Celee's husband suggested we play the song "Welcome to the Hotel California" as we drive into Cali. We laughed because the lyrics say it all. Here are the last lines of the song Hotel California,
"Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back
To the place I was before
'Relax,' said the night man,
'We are programmed to receive.
You can check-out any time you like,
But you can never leave!'

hahahaha. It's funny because when we left years ago, we thought to ourselves, "if we don't get out now, we never will". We honestly said that.

Now though, things are different. We have God. We have other Christians we will seek out and lean on (a step we really didn't know to do before when we were young Christians here). Even our family is different now, and we are all getting better about avoiding the drama that used to prevail at family gatherings.
I have to say, the beautiful 78 degree weather is helping me in all my sadness of missing my dear precious sisters in Christ back in Lawton. Praising God for the good things in the midst of this change.
pictures of the road trip soon to come :)

Parenting advice worth passing along…

Parenting advice worth passing along…

You can follow the link above to read a short but very profound point on Parenting. My favorite quote from the post was "As I near this final chapter of having kids in the home, I realize more and more that the overall goal in parenting is to emphasize heart inhabitation (a Spirit-led life) more than behavior modification. It’s not about raising “good kids,” but rather “godly kids.”

So true! I am glad I am learning this now while my kids are still fairly young. It is so hard to practice because it does take a lot of effort, and consistency, and love and patience, and on and on and on it goes. Which is hard on the "weak" flesh that we walk in, isn't it? But the fruits of the labor is great indeed! I am still learning so much, and changing so much. I have far to go, but I am on my way :)
p.s. Beyond this article, there are a lot of great resources that help encourage parents to teach to the heart of their children, not just modify behavior. Some of those resources are books like "Shepherding your child's heart", "Don't make me count to three!" and the complete audio series by Steve and Teri Maxwell "Encouragement for the homeschooling family" (which by the way is being offered as a "giveaway" at Miscellaneous Musings of a 5x mom so hop on over there and enter!!)

The view from here.

Let's be honest, moving is messy work. The more you pull out to box up, the more you realize you have. And the more you have the more it spills out into every place you want to walk. I am sincerely contemplating becoming a minimalist :) You know, one of those people who have like one spatula and two pots in their kitchen so it always looks neat and clean? The bedroom neatly and easily fits both husband and wife and the shared closet is not over flowing? Yup, I want to become one of those people.

Yeah, I am thinking less REALLY is more.

Soooooo we are down to five more days till load up time, and my house is getting less and less inviting to me....I wonder why?? check out the very "real" pictures of how we are living these days. I hope all of your houses are doing better :) Next post may very possibly be written in California!

Above is the view of my living room

Above is the view of my kids playing in their room on one of the mattresses.

View from my room into the hallway.

View of my room....*sigh* Ohhhhh the chaos of it all.

Baby girl is 9.

How truly sad and wonderful it is to watch your little ones grow. I cannot believe my little firstborn is 9 now. I guess every mother thinks that with each passing year, but still it's a struggle. I love her so much and couldn't be more proud of the little lady she is becoming. So sweet, and careful of others, and yet her best attribute is her unyielding faith and devotion to the God who made her. Here are some pictures of her on her birthday receiving her very own sewing machine. Her NaNa got it for her. She has been using mine when she does her sewing lessons and it was wayyyy too heavy for her. Now she has this precious machine that is green (her favorite color) and has Hello Kitty on it (which is her Auntie Jamie's favorite figure).




And here are some pictures of her Birthday party we had a few days later at the bowling alley. We don't do birthdays up too big in this family, but the bowling alley party was actually a lot of fun. The kids were great.






And below is Ireland's cake that she got to decorate herself! She is so smart :)