The Call.

So here's the good stuff.........


Thursday:


On Thursday afternoon I was watering my back yard and picking up dog poo (my life is super glamorous right?) when I heard my cell ring.  I decided not to try and leap through the poo I was picking up in order to run and get it, so I ignored it.  Luckily my daughter answered it.  Next thing I knew, my sister (who was over visiting with me that day) was coming outside with my phone and said "Valerie, someone from Adoption Network is on the phone".  My heart dropped.


"Don't get excited Valerie.  Don't get excited!  It's probably just a "check in" phone call"   That's what I was telling myself as my sister walked towards me with the phone.  Those 6 long steps it took her to get to me seemed like 6 miles.


"Hello, Valerie, this is Martha (name changed for privacy) from Adoption Network, and I think I have a possible match for you"


I was waiting for the surge of adrenalin.  That heart racing type of excitement.  At least a smile to cross my face.  But still I held back.  Held back my heart from this moment.  Not wanting it to be crushed.  


I said "OH, really, well tell me the situation"


She went on to describe a situation that broke my heart.  I cannot reveal too many details about the birth mom's life, but I can tell you several things that stood out to me.  One of them, was that she had five children already.  That's when my mind when on "processing mode".  I KNEW when I heard that, that she would change her mind.  I just knew it.  How can someone with 5 children place their sixth for adoption?  I am not saying that in a judgmental tone, but a tone of compassion.  I knew she was in a tough spot and I completely understood as to why she felt she needed to place this child for adoption.  But in my heart at the time I thought "she is going to make this decision now, but she will take one look at that child and change her mind."


Then the worker for ANLC (adoption network law center) said the second thing that sent my mind reeling, she said both the mother and father have MS.  "crap Valerie, think!!!  what's MS???  what's MS????  It has to do with the nervous system I think.  Is it genetic??  If it is, when will it effect the baby??"


After that the woman says "Oh and she lives in California about an hour and a half from you"


"WOW GOD, your amazing."  That is specifically what I had been praying for.  I knew the odds of getting a child in California were small.  There is 50 states in this country and ANLC works in all of them.  So we knew the odds were that we would probably have to go out of state.   Which of course, I wouldn't mind, given the circumstances!  A baby is a wonderful reason to travel :-)   BUT, we also had heard stories of couples being stuck in states for almost a month after the baby was born due to the varying laws from state to state that regulate the taking of infants across state lines before all paperwork is completed.  4 weeks in a hotel is A LOT of money.  Money we weren't sure we had.  That's a lot of time also for my kids to be away.  Anyhow, one night I just remembered that God says "You have not because you ask not", so I asked Him "Lord, I will be grateful for any child, but if it's possible, can the child be born in California?"  And so He did, as I requested.  He is so good.


So Martha for ANLC finally asked, after giving all the details she could at that time, if we would be willing to accept a child that has the possibility of one day having MS, and also a birth Father who wants visits and letters and pictures.  I told her that my husband and I had already discussed whether or not we would accept a match to a child with disabilities or possible disabilities, and we had firmly come to the conclusion that we would.  I told her that I was pretty certain that we would not turn this opportunity away, but that I had to quickly call my husband who had just landed in North Carolina for a business trip and let him know.  


Still my heart held back a little.


I called my husband.  Poor guy was surrounded by soldiers and could barely hear.  He finally got to a quiet area of the room and I told him all that I knew.  I told him my fears of the mother changing her mind, and my fears of the MS, but that I was 100% on board if he was.  He said "I am absolutely on board.  Remember Valerie, if she changes her mind then that is OK, we did not get into this to take a child, but adopt one who needs to be adopted."   I love that man.


I called Martha back and told her.  She said that she would now present our profile to the couple.  The couple had not even picked us!  Martha did.  I cannot begin to tell you how much I love this woman. We had a wonderful talk after that.  Words I will treasure in my heart.   


She then told me that after she showed our profile to this couple, that they would then approve us or not.  


I had to wait until 9am the next day to find out.


Still my heart held back a little.


Friday:


She called at 9 in the morning saying that they really liked us and would be glad to be matched with us. 


We then scheduled a conference call with my husband in North Carolina for that afternoon so she could give us all the info that she had on the Birth Mother and Birth Father.  We went through that conference call and felt so much more excited after that call.


My heart opened up a bit more each day of that weekend.  


Monday:


We had a phone conference with me and my husband in our room, Martha at her office at ANLC and the Birth Father and Birth Mother at their place.  It was awkward at first, but then turned into one of the most amazing phone calls of my life.  I cannot tell you how many miraculous things that God worked in that phone call.  Needless to say, it went well.  We were really really really worried that when they found out what crazy homeschooling Christians we were, that they would run in the opposite direction.  So even though one is an Atheist and one practices Wicca, AND I gave my testimony over the phone, they still thought they would love to place their precious son in our lives.   Amazing.  
After this phone call I realized that I could let my heart  hope and love this child.  Regardless of what may come.  After talking with her I believe it is unlikely she will keep the child.


The next step will be meeting the couple.  We are driving up to their city on November 8th.  I am super nervous but I know God's hand is in this all.   


Prayer requests:


~That God will use me to show them the love of Christ, without hesitation.
~That the baby survives this very difficult pregnancy, as the mother is very disabled with her MS and wheel chair bound.  She is six and a half months pregnant and still not showing.  But she is receiving medical care.
~That my heart will love fully and accept whatever is to come.
~That Jake and I would be able to qualify and be selected for grants to help us pay off our adoption debts.




More to come soon!!!