In the midst of personal stress, be it emotional, spiritual, marital, or health (and in some cases many of these at the same time), how do you stay focused?
Lately I have felt the Lord prompt my heart to stay focused on Him, Him alone, and The blessings He has given me.
I started to realize that in times like these, I needed to have on blinders to the distractions or even just distracting thoughts in my life. I needed to see Him and focus on that. So I did.
When thoughts came asking "Am I good enough wife?"
I focused on the fact that God knows all things about me and loves me as His beloved daughter anyway.
When thoughts came asking "Am I good enough mother?"
I focused on the fact the God knows all things about me and loves me as His beloved daughter anyway.
When thoughts came asking "Will I be everything the child we adopt needs?"
I focused on the fact the God knows all things about me and loves me as His beloved daughter anyway.
When thoughts came asking "Will my health continue to deteriorate and rob me of vitality and youth?"
I focused on the fact that God is good and has his plans all worked out.
When thoughts came asking "Do Jake and I have a strong enough marriage to make it through?"
I focused on the fact that God is good and has his plans all worked out.
You see where I am going with this right?
It sounds silly at first. Like I'm repeating phrases to "change" something. But it wasn't like that at all. It was taking my eyes off the world and placing them on things above! (Col 3:10)
It worked too. :-)
So my advice when your heart and head seem to be at war with you.....
Look at what God has blessed you with and Thank HIM.
Work on something that keeps your hands busy.
And most importantly BREATH HIM IN, and rest in His promises.
Staying focused.
Divided.
Just got done watching this movie. It was well done and thought provoking to say the LEAST. Follow this link to watch it in it's entirety for free.
Let me know what you think.
After that kick your feet up, snuggle those kiddos, kiss your husband good, and enjoy your weekend!!
The Boy
I think we have been giving the boy too much sugar.....
Don't judge. He didn't get that behavior from me ;-)
p.s. He has always liked wearing the most random "getups". When he was little you could almost always catch him wearing rain boots, camo-shorts, a long sleeve shirt, and a batman cape. These days he limits it to just the batman cape and a funny hat, and that's usually only on days he gets too much sugar.
Adoption.
Hello there! Well if you read the last post, you know that things have not been super encouraging this last few months. Lot's of things have fallen through, things just haven't gone right, and I just have not felt like myself lately. But besides the encouragement that I have received from a few sweet sweet ladies, one thing that has consistently put a smile on my face has been the adoption. So I thought I would give you all an update.
We are currently at the end of submitting all our paperwork needed for the "home study". Then a social worker will come out and start the interviews. Once that is complete and all our paperwork is approved, and we get back our background checks, than we will be finished with our Home Study.
At that point then we will wait to be "matched" with a child from South Korea.
There is a small twist in that though. We are doing what is called a Parallel adoption. Meaning we are pursuing the "standard" adoption program AND the "waiting child" adoption program at the same time. So we can wait the 5 months to be matched with a "healthy" child, or in the meantime review children that are available with disabilities. We are praying about this option.
For those who do not know, the Waiting Child program is an adoption program for adopting children with special needs (or older children or sibling groups, but this is almost never the case from Korea. They have primarily infants and toddlers with disabilities). Those special needs are very varied. They can be anything from a birthmark to Down Syndrome, and everything in between. We are not sure what God has planned through all this, but we are leaving ourselves open.
The time frame for all this can change at any moment. We are being told anywhere from 12 to 30 months from now. It seems soooo far off! I cannot believe that my youngest will be AT LEAST 8 by the time we are able to receiver our little one from Korea.
That will be an ADJUSTMENT!
So at this time our prayers are(if you do desire to pray with us)
*That God will provide the funds for this adoption.
*That the child we will adopt is safe and being cared for by loving people right now.
*That God would continue to speak to my heart about His unfailing love for me an my family.
*That some of my hormone issues will be worked out soon.
*That my husband and I would have a weekend soon to get away together and bond. We have been married 9 1/2 years and never taken a vacation alone together.....ever. We are thinking this would be a good time. We need money and a free weekend.
Lord help us :-)
Encouragement.
So where do we go for encouragement? I'm not talking fluffy stuff. I am talking soul shaking, heart healing, truthful love that comes from the Father through a Sister in Christ. I have been so discouraged lately with some things going on. Not to the point of utter despair or hopelessness, but.....pretty close to it. Most of these things are are internal "pruning" type things. Things God is working out in me. Things that are going on in my heart and mind that honestly, most people either don't understand or don't care to.
So I ask again, when you are going through these dark nights of the soul, where do you turn?
Recently I have found a lot of comfort in a blog, of all places. Sounds just plain silly but this woman has truly spoken to me, encouraged me, and laid her life out on her little piece of cyber space to encourage women going through some of these thoughts. Her blog is called "Journey to Beloved". And that is exactly where I am seeking to be. To see myself not just as His follower, but as His BELOVED. I feel lately that I am not beloved to any one. Doesn't every person, especially every girl, long to be someones beloved? What an endearing term that is. I am learning. I am listening to Him. But I also hear the words of the evil one who speaks and says I am not worthy. I am not beloved. I am nothing. But the voice of Him who loves my soul is winning. I am listening for that voice who says "I WILL CALL THOSE WHO WERE NOT MY PEOPLE, ‘MY PEOPLE,’ AND HER WHO WAS NOT BELOVED, ‘BELOVED.’” (Romans 9:25)
I am learning. I am listening. Thank you so Julie at Journey to Beloved. You are helping me on my journey.
Things I'm thinking on.
Hello sweet people! This has not been a boring last few months. I have sooo much to blog about and yet..... it's almost so much I cannot put it all into words.
Valerie can't put something into words!?!? I know...shocking ;-)
Anyhow, what I thought I would do it give an update by sort of just laying out things I am thinking on.
I am thinking first and foremost about that FACT that I am a beloved daughter to the One True God, saved by His Grace, and expected to do NOTHING to earn his favor. I know we say that often in Christian circles, but I am realizing I live as though I do not believe it. I do not "think" or "dwell" on it as a reality in my life. So I live as though "one with no hope". Everyday I am being set free by focusing more on Him, less on me and less on other people's lives and walks.
I am also thinking about how awesome it's going to be to see God provide miraculously in the adoption process. The adoption program through South Korea is THE MOST expensive adoption (I think) that you can do. I am moving past fear and guilt as to whether we can afford it or not and moving into trusting God, knowing He provides for the orphans and sets the lonely in families.
I am also thinking about the Grace that has been bestowed upon me through Jesus and how I can relate that to my parenting. This is HUGE for me. I truly am trying to see my expectations of my children through the lens of Grace.
I am also thinking about humility. I think God is in the process of humbling me :-)
It hurts. NO fun, to be sure. But I am starting to get a glimpse of the fact that it may be worth far more than Gold when He is finished.
Irelands room.
I am loving my daughters room. We have been piecing it together with tidbits that we have dug out of the garage, bought at thrift stores, or even *gasp* bought brand spanking new. The furniture was mine when I was younger, the bedding Ireland saved up and bought herself last year, and the curtains are (as we call it in this house) "store bought". :-) Enjoy.
